Sunday, March 17, 2013

Soulmates-do they exist?

There is a myth that tells us how human beings were once the perfect blend of masculine and feminine. These creatures are called androgynous and were so perfect and powerful that the gods envy them, and decided not to allow someone to be more perfect than them. Halved these powerful beings and, as legend has it, split half and roam the world to find one after the other, to come together again and become perfect and powerful again.

This sounds good, kinda romantic. Knowing that in this world there is someone who is made for you and with whom you will, when you finally find him, function perfectly. And it is just a farytale. It is unrealistic and impossible. And also the source of many problems in  love life and one of the biggest obstacles in the search for a romantic partner.


Here are a few reasons why you believe in it for you there is only one soul mate can adversely affect your love life:

  • If we believe that we have one half of a perfect being, this means that in this world, for us there is only one right person. This belief narrows our choice to just one person, and also sets the criteria  too high-that someone has to suit us perfectly. Looking for the one person in the whole world that suits us is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Where to go, what to do? This belief also puts us in a passive position, waiting for fate to have mercy on us and allow us to meet with her other half. 

  • believes that this will be the one person to function perfectly, and as soon as the first occurrence of disagreements, misunderstandings first, that we are apt to declare that person unrelated soul, hang up and keep looking for the right soul-mate. We expect that person to always know what we think, what we want, what we need, what bothers us ... 

  • feeling of emptiness and incompleteness interpret our lack of the second half, and instead we look at ourselves, take responsibility for yourself, your life and your happiness, waiting for the one who is perfect for us and complement our appearance. We believe that it will meet with the person to lead our discontent disappear and to fill our inner emptiness without anything that we have taken on this issue. 

  • We believe that we will soon meet the person know right away that it is "it", we somehow feel it. And in that way and deprive yourself, and some good people a chance to get to know each other, come together and may continue through life together. Not a perfect blend that works perfect, but as two imperfect individuals that invest time and energy in order to build together something beautiful and valuable for both. 

When the myth of soulmates understood only as a beautiful story, and when we accept the reality that we are imperfect, it is a human right and that there are more people in this world who can match us and with whom we can build a nice but imperfect and pleasant affair-then itself increases the chances that our love life is beautiful and full.
Then the passive position of waiting to meet soulmate is shifted towards the active position of searching for optimal love, someone that travels through life, whole or part, may be beautiful and harmonious.

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How to become more attractive?

Although most people say that looks are not important, research shows that is not so. In a number of studies repeated the following form: when they ask respondents whether how someone looks is important, most of them say no, but when you put them in a situation to choose, they choose the most physically attractive person.

Physical appearance is not important, or at least not a crucial factor in maintaining relationships, but it is important in the  first contact. Physical appearance is something that, whether we like it or not, other people will notice first. Many of you will say, "But I want someone to love me for who I am, not because of how I look." As it is an either-or situation. You are either pretty or nice person. And that's not true. All combinations are possible: that someone is a bad person and good looking, nice person and good looking, the bad person and the ugly and the bad person and good looking. If in this equation we introduce the wit, the same rules remain. Someone can be beautiful, smart and a good person, nice, stupid, bad man, etc.. The illusion of choice between beauty and brains is more common in women, and therefore many wonderful women who have much to offer, not only does not stand out but sometimes conceal their physical beauty. They refuse to put the makeup on, not  wear skirts, dresses, high  heels, will not wear long hair ... just because they don`t  to be put in the category of "a pretty stupid / superficial."
If you accept that it is important how you look, and pay attention to that aspect of your being, you increase the chance to make more people interested in zou, and therefore have a bigger and better selection of potential candidates for the relationship. This is true for both men and women.
This does not mean that you should go for plastic surgery to fit in the current aesthetic trends, nor to dress in the latest fashion.
That means taking care to highlight what is beautiful on you, and how you dress reflects your personality.
When women emphasize their femininity, they become more attractive to men. When men emphasize their masculinity, they become more attractive to women.
It does not make zou a superficial person, nor will it reduce your inner qualities. On the contrary, it will enrich you for another dimension-besides being a pleasant company, you'll be pleasant to look at.

Most people do not make a distinction between beauty and attractiveness. Beauty is such a subjective category we know, every society and every era has its own criteria. And individuals differ in to what is good. One may look nice, have a good looking body, has regular features, nicely dressed  and noone approaches them. There are many people who conclude on the basis that they are not beautiful, or that something is wrong with them.

Are we going to be attractive to others does not depend on our physical characteristics, it depends on our attitude.
It depends on what we think about our appearance, if we believe that we are beautiful  most others will perceive us that way.
The second, more important factor is the attractiveness of nonverbal messages you send to others about whether to approach us or not. Other people feel if you are open to communication, and on that basis, usually unconsciously, decide whether or not to approach you. If someone seems distant and closed, others will take that as a "do not come near me," and will save themselfs a potential rejection.


The most important attraction factor is how you feel about yourself. If you feel comfortable in your own skin, if you like the life you live and if you think of yourself that you have something to offer to others, you will be charming and attractive. Nonverbal messages you send, "I'm worth getting to know people and  it is worth spending time with me."

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